Students are on break and things are dreadfully boring here. I know book reviews may not sound like fun for any readers out there, but I just need to write. I've had a lot of time to read some good books recently so if any of these books sound interesting to you, run out and get them!
Surprised By Hope - N.T. Wright
My Rating: 4.5/5
First off, I'd like to thank Karen Park for sending me this book. I know it was hardcover and expensive and the shipping probably cost the same amount as the book, but I had a great time reading it. Thanks for being such a great supporter and encourager!
In the Pauline theological world, there's a lot of debate over N.T. Wright's New Perspective on Paul and what it means for justification and all that. The first books I read by Wright were about these issues so I had no idea what his books for the normal reader was like. Wright, in Surprised by Hope, attempts to bring back the biblical meaning of "resurrection" and the hope that it brings to us as believers today.
Christians tend to think about this life, and life-after-death, but Wright calls his readers to look beyond to "life-after-life-after-death." Everyone knows that those who are in Christ will "go to heaven" but what about the resurrection of the body? It seems like that doctrine is always tacked on at the end and it has no significant meaning to us. Most people when they think of heaven lack the biblical worldview of resurrection and therefore have no tools to think about what the new heavens and the new earth will look like. Our secular worldview has conditioned us to think about clouds and golden gates.
"Life-after-life-after-death" means that we're not just sitting here on this earth as it goes to gutter waiting for Jesus to come back. It's a realization that when Jesus does come back, the new heavens and the new earth will be the very one we're on right now! (Restored and redeemed of course). Wright has further opinions how this has significance in our lives today in terms of world politics and economics and things but you can take that part with a grain of salt.
This book will radically change your worldview on what the resurrection and Jesus being its firstfruit means in our lives today!
Next Evangelicalism - Soong Chan Rah
My Rating: 4.5/5
Pastor Daniel recommended this book to me and man did it challenge me and change my perspectives! Rah comes out with guns blazing against the "white cultural captivity" of the American or Western church. He calls Christians to look for the Spirit moving in World Christianity and not designating the growing power of ethnic churches around the world and in America into side-categories.
All the arguments against white cultural captivity aside (which is quite fascinating), Rah challenged me personally as a second-generation Korean American. Are there any other second-gen kids of immigrant families out there that wonder why they only feel comfortable with people just like us? Rah states that we are in a state of liminality between two cultures having to constantly balance the values and beliefs of two worldviews. However, he encourages people like us to become the bridge for multi-ethnic fellowship in America.
He also challenged me to question the cultural values that are contrary to the gospel. He calls Christians to recover the theology of suffering in our personal lives. Rather than getting that education, getting a nice job, settling in the suburbs and going out to our nice megachurch in the name of God, Rah challenges Christians to find honor not from moving out into the suburbs, but by moving towards the hurt, marginalized, and needy of society. Helping out the needy on weekends is good, but it will never give us the full picture of suffering and daily life of the needy. Rah's picture of incarnational ministry is compelling and absolutely needed in the church today.
A definite must read for my fellow second-generation Korean American friends!
Gospel-Driven Life - Michael Horton
My Rating: 3.5/5
I couldn't put this book down when I first started it, but somewhere in the middle it just took me forever to finish. This book almost single-handedly convinced me to go to a Reformed seminary like Westminster. And Horton's ever persistent focus upon the gospel, gospel, gospel alone really shaped my thinking for a couple months. This book is a great example of the strengths of Reformed theology (or whatever I think I know of it). Horton is able to draw out these metaphors and archetypes and man I don't know how to describe it but he just makes one huge compelling story and biblical narrative that continually points to Christ.
Horton's main point in this book is to reveal that a gospel-driven life is not one that is set about "doing" with programs and events, but rather hearing and receiving and being changed. Like that one picture of the soldier kissing a random nurse on Victory Day in Times Square, Horton argues that when the gospel is presented as the good news that it is, life transformation is automatically responsive and changes the way we look at life, community, religion, etc.
If you want a taste of true Reformed perspective on Christian life, give this book a try.
Pagan Christianity - Frank Viola and George Barna
My Rating: 3.0/5
Had I not read this book with a well-informed critique by The Resurgence blog, I think I would have been majorly screwed. This book really messed with my paradigm of how church should do church. The main thesis of this book is that the modern institutional church is more a product of pagan influence down the centuries than of the Bible. Viola argues for the organic church - a house-based, non-hierarchical, open-participatory fellowship of Christians - as the true New Testament church model. (I actually want to go to an organic church once to see what it's like now.)
This book was compelling because it uses historical analysis to trace the roots of things like the modern pastor, sermon, conception of church, division of clergy/laity. I like history so it was just interesting to read from that point of view. However the critique at the Resurgence seems to give good historical evidence for the opposing side so I am at some sort of judgmental standstill (with a preference towards what I know and love of course).
I'd recommend the first two books over this one but if it sounds interesting at all, I'd suggest reading it with the critique at the Resurgence.
Happy reading!
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Language and Listening
I know what you all are thinking:
"Wait, another post about language? When will he get bored of it?"
Yes, another post about language or learning language. I tend to think about one subject and just squeeze out as many different possibilities and applicable points until it runs dry. (If you don't believe me, ask Pastor Jonas about when I first learned about Calvinism - that's all I wanted to talk about for months). ((Do periods go inside or outside of a closing parenthesis?)) As learning language is something that I am aware of everyday, different thoughts and points of application run through my mind. I hope this will be my last one, and it's not long - just something short I thought about today.
But onto the post.
Language and Listening
My Thai teacher commented today that I was pretty good at speaking Thai but my listening comprehension was terrible. She also pointed out how the other short-term missionary from Korea (who came two months after me) was really good at listening and understanding, but not so at speaking. Now I usually take my compliments gluttonously and my criticisms like poison , but this was true so I accepted her comment and thought about it.
The Korean short-termer (Youngrae) has gotten pretty good in her Thai language acquisition in less time and less experience in Thai language than I have. (I almost put "than me" but props to Iris for always correcting my grammatical mistakes - parrallel structure!) I never knew how good she had gotten until one day one of the Thai students said something to me and while I was struggling to understand or asking the student to repeat, Youngrae just blurted out the meaning. There had been no real way of gauging her respective language level before because she rarely spoke Thai. Youngrae lives and stays at Baan Joy most of her time and just sits and listens to the students carrying on with their daily routine. But just like that my perspective on her level changed, and I noticed that her Thai was pretty dang good.
I see two valuable lessons I have learned about myself or life. (I'm also trying a point-by-point style writing so I can stay more focused while I write instead of wandering off into tangents - there's always good old parentheses to wander off into random thoughts right?)
1. I realized that the fact that my speaking skills were good and my listening skills were bad and that Youngrae's listening skills were good and her speaking skills were bad revealed my own personality deficiency. My first instinct was to write off this observation to something inherent in culture. (And one big weakness in being interested in cultural or social influences is you tend to write off all your weaknesses and blame some outside influence that you had no control over. I just have to realize that I'm to blame sometimes.) There may be some truth into the culture insight - Koreans tend not to speak a new language until they feel they're at a point where they can speak to some measure of success, whereas Americans have a very confident, learn-by-mistake mentality in how they approach language. (But Americans also do expect the rest of the world to speak English, haha) (So much for point-by-point, look how much I've wandered off already.)
Anyway, I realized that the reason that I spoke better than I comprehended was none other than my close friend and enemy - pride. Oh pride, you insidious creature! You'll never leave me alone will you? For what brings more attention and honor and glory - people hearing you speak Thai with perfect tones and grammatical structure or people knowing you can understand them? I remember now that the times I put effort into learning a new structure or new vocabulary were motivated by my desire to see the Thai students impressed by my progression. And that one time when they said they thought I had learned Thai better than other missionaries they've seen before? Pure gold poison into my heart. The delight I felt as I saw the looks of approval on people's faces when I was able to share on Sunday for the first time what I was thankful for in the Thai language was all pride! PRIDE!
When it came down to it, I never really liked to listen to people. This is true not only in Thailand but in the entirety of my life. In conversations, my favorite thing to do was not to absorb the wisdom of others but to give the final word - my superior, more-educated, more-well-thought-out, more-logical, more-impressive opinion. And looking back, I see why I felt so hampered in the beginning of my ministry here in Thailand. I love to teach and I feel it is a gift God has given me. But now I see how my sinful nature can warp even my most prized gift. Teaching requires one to speak and put ideas into communicable words. I couldn't do this with my lack of Thai language and so I felt useless. I felt like my gift was being wasted. But now I see that even when gift is utilized, even for good purposes, there's that evil part of me stealing the glory as I see people impressed by the words that come out of my mouth.
And in the beginning I never liked sitting in a room where people would be talking and I had no idea what was going on, so I would just stay in my room rather than put myself out there. (And I don't think it's all bad because being in those environments is quite draining. Introverts need time to rest sometimes.) But when my Thai got better and I could converse with the students and even give some witty retorts, spending time with the students got more fun. But that thread of pride being woven through all my experiences in learning Thai is quite visible now. My sinful nature craves that attention and approval I receive when I speak.
"When I want to do right, evil lies close at hand." - Romans 7:21
So that's point one, just kind of another realization and understanding of the ever-so pervasive nature of my sinful heart. "Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!"
2. I realize more than ever that listening is a gift. This world prizes the gifted speakers. Great preachers receive all the attention and have the most visited blogsites (why else would you go?). Great speakers become presidents and leaders and obtain all sorts of positions of power. There is great power in speaking and the art of communication to sway the minds, attitudes, and beliefs of listeners. It's quite natural we place such a high value on that gift.
But I devote space to the under-appreciated art and gift of listening. I am really impressed by the way Youngrae sits day in and day out in the common room at Grace Fellowship as students carry on their daily routine. Like I said before, I just could never do this and here's my fruit of several months of avoiding passive listening - I can't comprehend people when I listen. Youngrae will never get the status points for speaking but she'll always be a reliable ear for anyone who needs it.
I remember hearing a sermon example by a pastor about how when his wife came to him with his problems he would always try to respond with his pastoral and theological advice. But one day his wife told him, "I need you to stop being a pastor and just listen." Pastors talk and talk and we listen because they do have very important advice. But a huge part in being a pastor (or any loving Christian) has to be listening to people.
People want to be heard. People don't want to hear another cookie-cutter solution to a complex problem. There's great release in just being able to express every emotion, feeling, and thought to someone who truly cares about every word you're saying, rather than just waiting for an opportunity to say something profound.
I hope that this little insight into my own weakness will prepare me to be a better husband, friend, brother, son or minister. I pray that God will give me the gift of listening. And this being my more practical point, I hope that any reader would also see the value of listening and seek to be a dependable ear as a way of showing love to those around.
"Wait, another post about language? When will he get bored of it?"
Yes, another post about language or learning language. I tend to think about one subject and just squeeze out as many different possibilities and applicable points until it runs dry. (If you don't believe me, ask Pastor Jonas about when I first learned about Calvinism - that's all I wanted to talk about for months). ((Do periods go inside or outside of a closing parenthesis?)) As learning language is something that I am aware of everyday, different thoughts and points of application run through my mind. I hope this will be my last one, and it's not long - just something short I thought about today.
But onto the post.
Language and Listening
My Thai teacher commented today that I was pretty good at speaking Thai but my listening comprehension was terrible. She also pointed out how the other short-term missionary from Korea (who came two months after me) was really good at listening and understanding, but not so at speaking. Now I usually take my compliments gluttonously and my criticisms like poison , but this was true so I accepted her comment and thought about it.
The Korean short-termer (Youngrae) has gotten pretty good in her Thai language acquisition in less time and less experience in Thai language than I have. (I almost put "than me" but props to Iris for always correcting my grammatical mistakes - parrallel structure!) I never knew how good she had gotten until one day one of the Thai students said something to me and while I was struggling to understand or asking the student to repeat, Youngrae just blurted out the meaning. There had been no real way of gauging her respective language level before because she rarely spoke Thai. Youngrae lives and stays at Baan Joy most of her time and just sits and listens to the students carrying on with their daily routine. But just like that my perspective on her level changed, and I noticed that her Thai was pretty dang good.
I see two valuable lessons I have learned about myself or life. (I'm also trying a point-by-point style writing so I can stay more focused while I write instead of wandering off into tangents - there's always good old parentheses to wander off into random thoughts right?)
1. I realized that the fact that my speaking skills were good and my listening skills were bad and that Youngrae's listening skills were good and her speaking skills were bad revealed my own personality deficiency. My first instinct was to write off this observation to something inherent in culture. (And one big weakness in being interested in cultural or social influences is you tend to write off all your weaknesses and blame some outside influence that you had no control over. I just have to realize that I'm to blame sometimes.) There may be some truth into the culture insight - Koreans tend not to speak a new language until they feel they're at a point where they can speak to some measure of success, whereas Americans have a very confident, learn-by-mistake mentality in how they approach language. (But Americans also do expect the rest of the world to speak English, haha) (So much for point-by-point, look how much I've wandered off already.)
Anyway, I realized that the reason that I spoke better than I comprehended was none other than my close friend and enemy - pride. Oh pride, you insidious creature! You'll never leave me alone will you? For what brings more attention and honor and glory - people hearing you speak Thai with perfect tones and grammatical structure or people knowing you can understand them? I remember now that the times I put effort into learning a new structure or new vocabulary were motivated by my desire to see the Thai students impressed by my progression. And that one time when they said they thought I had learned Thai better than other missionaries they've seen before? Pure gold poison into my heart. The delight I felt as I saw the looks of approval on people's faces when I was able to share on Sunday for the first time what I was thankful for in the Thai language was all pride! PRIDE!
When it came down to it, I never really liked to listen to people. This is true not only in Thailand but in the entirety of my life. In conversations, my favorite thing to do was not to absorb the wisdom of others but to give the final word - my superior, more-educated, more-well-thought-out, more-logical, more-impressive opinion. And looking back, I see why I felt so hampered in the beginning of my ministry here in Thailand. I love to teach and I feel it is a gift God has given me. But now I see how my sinful nature can warp even my most prized gift. Teaching requires one to speak and put ideas into communicable words. I couldn't do this with my lack of Thai language and so I felt useless. I felt like my gift was being wasted. But now I see that even when gift is utilized, even for good purposes, there's that evil part of me stealing the glory as I see people impressed by the words that come out of my mouth.
And in the beginning I never liked sitting in a room where people would be talking and I had no idea what was going on, so I would just stay in my room rather than put myself out there. (And I don't think it's all bad because being in those environments is quite draining. Introverts need time to rest sometimes.) But when my Thai got better and I could converse with the students and even give some witty retorts, spending time with the students got more fun. But that thread of pride being woven through all my experiences in learning Thai is quite visible now. My sinful nature craves that attention and approval I receive when I speak.
"When I want to do right, evil lies close at hand." - Romans 7:21
So that's point one, just kind of another realization and understanding of the ever-so pervasive nature of my sinful heart. "Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!"
2. I realize more than ever that listening is a gift. This world prizes the gifted speakers. Great preachers receive all the attention and have the most visited blogsites (why else would you go?). Great speakers become presidents and leaders and obtain all sorts of positions of power. There is great power in speaking and the art of communication to sway the minds, attitudes, and beliefs of listeners. It's quite natural we place such a high value on that gift.
But I devote space to the under-appreciated art and gift of listening. I am really impressed by the way Youngrae sits day in and day out in the common room at Grace Fellowship as students carry on their daily routine. Like I said before, I just could never do this and here's my fruit of several months of avoiding passive listening - I can't comprehend people when I listen. Youngrae will never get the status points for speaking but she'll always be a reliable ear for anyone who needs it.
I remember hearing a sermon example by a pastor about how when his wife came to him with his problems he would always try to respond with his pastoral and theological advice. But one day his wife told him, "I need you to stop being a pastor and just listen." Pastors talk and talk and we listen because they do have very important advice. But a huge part in being a pastor (or any loving Christian) has to be listening to people.
People want to be heard. People don't want to hear another cookie-cutter solution to a complex problem. There's great release in just being able to express every emotion, feeling, and thought to someone who truly cares about every word you're saying, rather than just waiting for an opportunity to say something profound.
I hope that this little insight into my own weakness will prepare me to be a better husband, friend, brother, son or minister. I pray that God will give me the gift of listening. And this being my more practical point, I hope that any reader would also see the value of listening and seek to be a dependable ear as a way of showing love to those around.
Friday, March 5, 2010
Language and Christian Life
One of the interesting things about language acquisition is that the student will soak in the vocabulary, accents and inflections of the teacher. When I have a conversation with one of the students that is helping me with Thai, I understand and speak at an optimal level. Put me out on the streets with some stranger and all of a sudden I can understand barely half of what they are saying. On another point, my fellow co-workers in Sankampaeng and Hangdong teach children at elementary schools for their main ministries. Dealing with mostly adolescent children, their range of vocabulary and grammar is perfect for commands (like sit down, pay attention, clean up) and words pertaining to school related things (scissors, glue, ruler). On the other hand as I work in a university level Christian setting, helping with praise and worship and sitting through sermons and prayer times, I am exposed to and soak up all the Thai Christian-ese (words like worship, praise, prayer and phrases like "i feel thankful for..." or "praise God for..."). So when I'm placed in a children ministry setting, I'll do alright, but I'm not in my comfort zone with the particular phrases and vocabulary suited for such things.
On Sundays before worship, we go around the community of believers (church) and share things that we're thankful to God for. The couple times I did raise my hand to share something, the Thai students pushed me to share in Thai. When I did, I was amazed at the ease certain phrases came out or vocabulary that I thought I didn't know. The first couple times I was like, "Whoa, it's God! He just put the words in my mouth!" Not saying that's not true to a certain extent, but now that I think back, I see that much of what came out of my mouth was due to what I was absorbing in my surroundings.
Those long hours of cryptic Thai sermons and Bible studies that I had to pinch myself to get through? It actually did something. Missionary Daniel talks about how important it is just to sit and listen and soak in all the tones and inflections and words even if you don't understand any of it. I now see why he put me throughneedless needful torture. One day things start clicking and you try to do things on your own and it just comes out.
The point is that our Christian life and walk is no different. We humans as societal creatures naturally soak up the things in our surrounding culture - attitudes, behavior, values, and worldview. Where else do we get all of our cool sayings, hip clothing styles, and time-passing fads? (before I left it was break-dancing, would someone like to inform me what's cool to do in the Korean American community now?) Anyway, it should be pretty obvious why our walk with God stays superficial and shallow and the fruit we bear is meager and nominal when all we take in are the values and beliefs of our secular surroundings. The world screams at us that every moment needs to be lived in the here and now, in pleasure, and in fun and entertainment. A lot of people think that the Christian religion is all about denying yourself and they make fun of a belief system that denies "natural" desires in favor of a dry and stuffy moralistic lifestyle. And we as Christians buy what the world tells us what Christianity is. Thus we can't seem to bear Christ-like fruit in our lives because all we're trying to do is to negate the desires of our flesh. We're not actually focused on abiding in Christ and remaining in the vine so that we can take in from Him all the values and beliefs and worldviews and attitudes that will really satisfy us and bear fruit that will glorify God.
In all of our fighting and running away from the flesh, we also need to be running toward something, that is, a personal living God in Christ Jesus. In Romans 12, Paul calls us to be transformed by the renewing of our mind. He says in Philippians 4:8-9, "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you." Our daily walk has to be about surrounding, immersing and soaking our minds and hearts in Christ and the things of Christ. Only then we can really start putting into practice all that we have learned and received and heard.
A fruitful walk with God also calls for us to have good teachers and a good surrounding community of people. There's a reason I don't teach Korean here. It's what Jesus called the blind leading the blind. I also don't learn my Thai from my American friends. In the same way a student of language needs a teacher comfortable and fluent in the usage and theory of language, a disciple of Christ needs a shepherd, role-model, or leader who is consistent in his or her walk and grounded in his or her beliefs. Sometimes (okay a lot of times) I make mistakes as I try to speak Thai. People around me laugh but in the end I know they are genuinely invested in my improvement. I think a lot of times we're afraid to have someone further along in his or her life as a Christian discipling us because we think we may be judged, but in the end they're looking out for our interests in our own spiritual maturity. A good discipler produces a good disciple. We can't learn these things on our own. I don't think anyone can get Thai tones on their own. There's a reason why Paul continually exhorts his churches to be imitators of him as he imitates Christ.
The community add its own dimension to both language learning and spiritual maturity. I have one main Thai teacher, but everyone expresses language in their own unique way. The Thai I learn from one person may not be useful with another. My teacher takes the time to speak slowly and use simple words but not everyone's going to talk to me like a 3rd grade Thai student. Only going around and speaking with all types of people will I be able to better grasp the full expression and nuances of the Thai language. As Christians we learn from everyone in the body as God has gifted each one of us to mutually encourage one another towards maturity in faith. As an underclassman I learned about the rich beauty of praise and the true meaning of worship from Sam Kang, but I also soaked in the intellectually awe-inspiring value of theology and foundations of faith from Jonas Lee (now Pastor Jonas, haha...wait is Sam a pastor too? Worship Pastor Sam? I don't know). As an upperclassman I was humbled by my own weaknesses as I tried to lead others. In the end, we absorb the rich diversity of gifts and functions within the community of Christ to further understand Christian life and worship of God.
So take heed with what you surround yourself with, what you feed your mind and heart with. Let your soul feed upon the unsearchable riches of God's grace and feast at the banqueting table of God. Let your heart assent with all its emotion that it has tasted that the Lord is good. Find leaders you admire and wish to be like and learn from them. Imitate the strengths God has gifted them with. Interact within a community of like-minded believers and run the race together. Bear each others burdens and encourage one another.
And one day, you willspeak Thai be a faithful disciple and a light to the world.
On Sundays before worship, we go around the community of believers (church) and share things that we're thankful to God for. The couple times I did raise my hand to share something, the Thai students pushed me to share in Thai. When I did, I was amazed at the ease certain phrases came out or vocabulary that I thought I didn't know. The first couple times I was like, "Whoa, it's God! He just put the words in my mouth!" Not saying that's not true to a certain extent, but now that I think back, I see that much of what came out of my mouth was due to what I was absorbing in my surroundings.
Those long hours of cryptic Thai sermons and Bible studies that I had to pinch myself to get through? It actually did something. Missionary Daniel talks about how important it is just to sit and listen and soak in all the tones and inflections and words even if you don't understand any of it. I now see why he put me through
The point is that our Christian life and walk is no different. We humans as societal creatures naturally soak up the things in our surrounding culture - attitudes, behavior, values, and worldview. Where else do we get all of our cool sayings, hip clothing styles, and time-passing fads? (before I left it was break-dancing, would someone like to inform me what's cool to do in the Korean American community now?) Anyway, it should be pretty obvious why our walk with God stays superficial and shallow and the fruit we bear is meager and nominal when all we take in are the values and beliefs of our secular surroundings. The world screams at us that every moment needs to be lived in the here and now, in pleasure, and in fun and entertainment. A lot of people think that the Christian religion is all about denying yourself and they make fun of a belief system that denies "natural" desires in favor of a dry and stuffy moralistic lifestyle. And we as Christians buy what the world tells us what Christianity is. Thus we can't seem to bear Christ-like fruit in our lives because all we're trying to do is to negate the desires of our flesh. We're not actually focused on abiding in Christ and remaining in the vine so that we can take in from Him all the values and beliefs and worldviews and attitudes that will really satisfy us and bear fruit that will glorify God.
In all of our fighting and running away from the flesh, we also need to be running toward something, that is, a personal living God in Christ Jesus. In Romans 12, Paul calls us to be transformed by the renewing of our mind. He says in Philippians 4:8-9, "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you." Our daily walk has to be about surrounding, immersing and soaking our minds and hearts in Christ and the things of Christ. Only then we can really start putting into practice all that we have learned and received and heard.
A fruitful walk with God also calls for us to have good teachers and a good surrounding community of people. There's a reason I don't teach Korean here. It's what Jesus called the blind leading the blind. I also don't learn my Thai from my American friends. In the same way a student of language needs a teacher comfortable and fluent in the usage and theory of language, a disciple of Christ needs a shepherd, role-model, or leader who is consistent in his or her walk and grounded in his or her beliefs. Sometimes (okay a lot of times) I make mistakes as I try to speak Thai. People around me laugh but in the end I know they are genuinely invested in my improvement. I think a lot of times we're afraid to have someone further along in his or her life as a Christian discipling us because we think we may be judged, but in the end they're looking out for our interests in our own spiritual maturity. A good discipler produces a good disciple. We can't learn these things on our own. I don't think anyone can get Thai tones on their own. There's a reason why Paul continually exhorts his churches to be imitators of him as he imitates Christ.
The community add its own dimension to both language learning and spiritual maturity. I have one main Thai teacher, but everyone expresses language in their own unique way. The Thai I learn from one person may not be useful with another. My teacher takes the time to speak slowly and use simple words but not everyone's going to talk to me like a 3rd grade Thai student. Only going around and speaking with all types of people will I be able to better grasp the full expression and nuances of the Thai language. As Christians we learn from everyone in the body as God has gifted each one of us to mutually encourage one another towards maturity in faith. As an underclassman I learned about the rich beauty of praise and the true meaning of worship from Sam Kang, but I also soaked in the intellectually awe-inspiring value of theology and foundations of faith from Jonas Lee (now Pastor Jonas, haha...wait is Sam a pastor too? Worship Pastor Sam? I don't know). As an upperclassman I was humbled by my own weaknesses as I tried to lead others. In the end, we absorb the rich diversity of gifts and functions within the community of Christ to further understand Christian life and worship of God.
So take heed with what you surround yourself with, what you feed your mind and heart with. Let your soul feed upon the unsearchable riches of God's grace and feast at the banqueting table of God. Let your heart assent with all its emotion that it has tasted that the Lord is good. Find leaders you admire and wish to be like and learn from them. Imitate the strengths God has gifted them with. Interact within a community of like-minded believers and run the race together. Bear each others burdens and encourage one another.
And one day, you will
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